I think I’m going to take a break from making things for a day or 2.

I kind of got frustrated today while at the skatepark trying to do a trick. I’m not sure why I was getting so frustrated. A lot of voices are talking in my head. Voices that aren’t even my voice. It’s voices of people that my friend tells me about skrrt. I’ve done a good job blocking those thoughts out which is good. However, I hate when they follow me to the skatepark. Tomorrow, I just want to skate and workout.

3 good things

1. didn’t do much at work

2. skated twice today. kind of hectic

3. got a salad today

i’m not sure why, but i feel like i’m gaining weight. I know I’m not, but my torso/stomach area look a lot bigger even though I can still see my abodmen. I’m just glad that I found out that with work being 32 hours a week next week, I can leave work early on Tuesday.

3 good things

1. Got to leave work early to go meet at the Denim shop. They gave us free control and are giving us clothes to skate in.

2. Bought the camera

3. Saw Eli land a lazer flip

4. My job reduced my hours back to 32 a week

I wasn’t expecting much from the denim shop that we went to. But when they said they wanted us to do whatever, I was really happy. I’m actually super happy that I get to art direct. I’m happy that I get to really go in on this and show that we’re going to give it our all to make content. This is a very good day.

Up above is a very incomplete design again. But I’m working slowly on things.

It’s interesting how removed I am from skateboarding in nyc. A lot of people who have a stake in it say that it won’t turn into anything. Fortunately, since I’m not in it, I don’t have to listen to it. As well, since I make my own money and got here because of my persistence and my drive, I’m just going to keep going. It doesn’t matter if it doesn’t turn into anything. My dream of being an art director at Nike Sb or Adidas skateboarding is starting to become more tangible. It’s my 3rd year in NYC. I’m going to keep pushing. I knew that would take about 5 years. At this point, it’s like our slogan. We make shit up as we go.

Today marks a whole month of being creative again :D

So as I was coming home, the maintenance guy, or the landlord, or whoever it was, was throwing away the wood that I collected over the last 2 weeks. People have been moving out and just leaving the parts of their cabinets for trash. However, like I realized with the Huf memorial piece, I can gather wood and strategically place it all over williamsburg.

It was weird though. The guy kind of annoys me. Yesterday, he was painting the inside of the apartment. I leave my bike on the banister inside the apartment locked up. Didn’t know where he was painting. I walked outside my apartment and just immediately, the condescending tone of excuse me is that your bike, can you move it hits my ears. The fact that he kept calling me buddy also made me a bit mad. Certain people can call me buddy and I find it endearing, but this guy, I was just getting annoyed. Anywho, I come home from picking up my take out, and I talk to him and say, you can leave the wood there, I’m going to move it. He keeps saying to me it is trash and if I leave it there, it’s trash. I say to him very loud and firm, I understand, I understand, I hear you. That was that. It’s funny because that tone of voice is my Dad’s voice. I find it interesting in the last few weeks that I’ve been talking back to people. Maybe it’s the baggy clothes that I’m wearing or something or the fact that people can’t see my face so I’m more likely to talk because they can’t hear or read my emotion. It’s kind of a cool thing.

Oh yeah, I was supposed to hang with a friend tonight but it started raining. But when I go outside, it’s super dry, there are kids at the skatepark. This friend is always so hard to hangout with or even get any time to hang with. Often times I have to go to the studio where they work to get a visit in. At a certain point, it’s just annoying so I think I’m just going to wait until this friend actually has time to hangout. I understand that they’re busy, but my time and what I look forward into the day is important.

3 good things

1. Got Thai food for takeout

2. Work was pretty smooth and went pretty fast today

3. wheatpasted

Tomorrow we have the meeting with the denim shop. I’m hoping to the universe that my small team actually shows up on time. But then again, I also don’t have that much of an expectation with the denim shop. I just want us to have an interview and that’s it.

3 good things

1. Talked to my friend, Esteban

2. Quickly designed this within an hour

3. I got to skate today and realized I should practice crooked grinds.

I’m excited to practice crooked grinds tomorrow.