Monday

3 good things..I’mma just write

Did a lot of things today. I woke up, rode my bike, walked Gemma, went to the post office twice, did work, ate food, biked to LES skatepark, and printed/wheatpasted this poster on a wooden board outside. Pretty productive day on a Monday. However, I just found out today that I’m back to 40 hour weeks. Goodbye to the 3 day weekend. And goodbye to what I thought was going to be a perfect next few months. Things are starting to return to normal as students are going back to school this week. Even one case of corona will close down a classroom and have everyone in it be quarantined for 2 weeks. I remember when quarantine started and when phase 1 was about to go into effect. I got really scared. I got scared because that meant having to go back to the reality of a 9-5. I went from regular 9-5 to 3 days a week to 4 days a week and now back to 5. I’ve been living just fine and now…I’m faced with the reality of a 9-5. That I’m no different from any other person. I’m not exceptional in the regards of being famous. I remember in one of these blogs that I wrote about how I never wanted to be famous, but still with instagram and the people that I’m starting to surround myself with, I want it now. I just want recognition in skateboarding or as a designer. But I guess I’m the type that has to try for many years before something finally happens. skrrt, the skateboard magazine that I’m running, got a small shop in SOHO to do an interview on us. It’s cool how really just putting yourself out there really does change things. I’m still not on my personal instagram. I’m not ready to put myself out there. It’s nice because I could finally just post myself up all the time and not care.

In other news, the board of wood that the poster is pasted on is actually a board that has been sitting outside my apt for the last month. No one has touched it so finally I said yesterday, I can use that to put it up. I then realized that if I find a piece of wood, I can paste it on it and put it wherever there are skaters. My work is now portable and I can directly target my audience.

Life is changing again and again. I have no other choice but to keep going. It’s wild when you’ve been on this world for almost 30 years. You learn a lot and yet there is so much to learn depending on if you want to have kids. A few days ago I was thinking about how if I wanted to have kids, I need to start settling down now or rather finding someone to partner with. It gives me a bit of anxiety thinking of that. But also, I’ve been ghosted several times in the last few weeks and frankly, I’m not as challenged by it. I think it’s because there’s so much to do in life now especially since I’m trying to get this zine off the ground that there is no time to think about women as much.